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So, with this second key I opened another door and it was to western medicine.  In 1993 I graduated with my LPN diploma. One good thing about 1993 was getting  to wear a nursing hat and white uniform.  I still think we should wear those hats but I have not found any other nurse to agree with me. I do however continue to wear the white uniform. The next 4 years I was a charge nurse for a nursing home.  That pharmacology class in college really paid off for this job because each evening I passed multiple medications to multiple residents in a short amount of time.   I realize now that my past loss of my mother was effecting my nursing career.  I felt she would have survived if the nurses and doctor would have been more attentive to her.  I was on a mission to make sure this was not going to happen to any of the residents but this task proved overwhelming.  I became angered and felt all alone in my crusade for patient advocacy. In my mind there were 73 residents and only one of me.  Why were we passing a dozen or more pills to each of these residents anyway? My father and even my pharmacology class taught me that medications have many side effects. It was quite obvious to me that half of these pills were to counteract the side effects of the other medications. Why not safely eliminate some of these medications and therefore free up more time to spend with the resident. So, in 1997 I began working for the local rural hospital and I continue to work at this same hospital.
 
This hospital was the very same hospital where my mother died. One of the nurses that I work with remembers the admission of my mother, my sister, and I to the hospitial in 1975.  She even shared with me that my sister and I were in room 244 together and my mother was in 238.  I try not to think of my mother when I take care of my patients in this room.  Hospital work is a lot different than nursing home work.  As a LPN I was assigned to the medical surgical floor. I was very satisfied with this work. I felt I had more control and my patients were getting good care. However, my past was still effecting me. The well being of my patients consumed me and I was definately going to make sure their care and well being was protected. I was every patients best nurse but I suspicion that I was a royal pain in the butt for some of the supervisors.  I could sense  the supervisors frustration when I brought my may concerns to them. This confused me because I felt a nuses role was to be the patients advocate. Here again I was going to prevent any harm from my patients. I realize now that my past was overpowering me. I did slowly learn to trust more and tamed my fear of harm and death. I received my RN degree in 2000 and the hospital reimbursed me for most of it. I found my calling upon opening the door to this degree and it was obstetrics. This was one field where it is a must that you are a patient advocate for 2 pateints and the supervisors and doctors don't mind this.  To this day I thoroughly enjoy obstretrics but they come far and few between in a rural hospital.  2 to 3 deliveries a month is our average and that is good considering our hospital is in a town with a population of between 1600 to 1700. I do have to say that as a RN for a rural hospital your role is unique in comparison to the larger city hospitals. You are responsible for ER, med surg, obstetrics, post surgicals, pediatrics, geriatrics, cardiac clinic, ambulance, and more. I feel proud that I now have 9 years experience in all of this.
 
In 2006 I returned to the same nursing home that I worked for between 1989 and 1997. But this time I was Director of Nursing. My number one goals were to improve patient care and employee working conditions. Initially all my goals were becoming accomplished but I soon found out that I was fighting a battle that could not be won.  The beast I was fighting was corporate. I did not stand a chance with patient advocacy as my best asset.
 
I returned back to the hospital in 2007 where I am now working in the cardiopulmonary, diabetes, anticoagulation clinic department. Perfect for me because I have become an educator in disease prevention and I have to thank my father for all the interest I have in this area. I also cont. to work on the nursing floor with obstetrics, med surg, peds, geriatrics,  post surgicals, or wherever the supervisor assigns me for the day.
 
Over the course of 16 years as nurse practicing western medicine I have gained trust in this medicine, have seen many benefits, and realize there is a time and place for it.  Over my lifetime I have also greatly benefited personally from alternative medicine. My father continues to avoid western medicine as much as he can and there is no convincing him any different. I only hope that the next key given to me will open a door where Eastern and Western medicine will compliment each other. Health care would have the best of both worlds if this would happen.

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